By D. Witte

As a child I learned a little saying…”Good, Better, Best, I will never rest, until my good is better and my better is best.” Recently I realized it’s one of those subliminal things, that was lying in the back of my mind, I’m usually unaware of but has been influencing my life. I wonder has that little saying kept me from being satisfied with my life, with myself? It’s certainly possible, since “I will never rest” feels like a call to perfection.

That’s how ego works. It’s been there since the beginning. I took the saying on as a child, assuming it was good guidance. Besides that, it rhymes! Turns out it was a ditty attributed to St. Jerome but not actually found in his writings. One reference cites Christian Work: Illustrated Family Newspaper – Volume 62 – Page 195, published in 1897. At any rate, I don’t recall the specific time I took it to heart, but it was probably a result of my parochial school education.

I now recall feeling driven to achieve high academic success. As a child I, like you and every other child was given positive reinforcement for good grades. It was motivating. It became a habit. Even as an undergrad, as an “older than average” student, I was advised, the way to succeed was to study 2 and ½ hours for every hour of class. I did it and got all A’s but at what cost? I’m not sure it made a difference. When I applied to graduate school, I was never asked for my transcript. Even, after I graduated with a Masters in Library Science, my job applications never requested a transcript of my stellar grades.   Could my life have been better if I had more time for other things? Perhaps I could have been more well-rounded by devoting more time to relating with others and serving my family and community.

But, in one way it was better, because having excellent grades gave me the confidence I had done my best. That discipline and devotion was an influence of the Piscean Age. Was it destiny and/or the need for my Soul to have that experience? The great thing now is I have the best of both worlds. The freedom of the Aquarian Age to choose my perspective and appreciate my past experience without judging it. 

Looking at it in adulthood, I realize I set myself up for failure by making the “Best” my goal? I skipped the idea of being better.  That didn’t even seem an option. I realize evolution is a gradual process in which something changes into a different and usually more complex or better form. That now seems to me a preferable and attainable goal without pressure. It gives me a sense of relief, to think I can be successful by being better. I don’t have to be “the best.”

Maybe, like me, you have a hidden cherished belief that is ruling your life? Something you do without really thinking about. Something like “Cleanliness is next to Godliness” or “I should……” Have you asked yourself why you do it? Or, if you really want or need to do it? Is there something that influences you like a slave driving tyrant? Is there some little thing that keeps you from accepting yourself as you are?

In the New Age, we are supported in learning to recognize things that no longer serve our greatest good. Recognition of something that is no longer who you are or want to be, is a first step. 

I do know, I can’t go back and re-do my education. I can chalk it up to experience and rejoice in the knowledge that making life better, for me, is the happy balance between good and best…”Better.” It helps to change from a focus on self-improvement and cultivate self-acceptance. I can stop listening to that inner critic (ego mind) and use my Thinker to support myself. 

This is not a call for us to be mediocre, it’s simply the idea that we need to make our own choices and not be ruled by some inflexible ideal given to us in childhood before we had the capacity to make an educated choice.

My new favorite quote is, “Judging yourself for what you haven’t yet accomplished, is like finding fault with a lion because it can’t fly or a bird because it can’t swim, or a tree because it can’t leave….well you know what I mean.”   (Anonymous)

Be free to love yourself as you are! You are totally awesome!